This week has seen a flurry of red roses, cards with hearts, and lots of soppy messages on social media. For many, it brightened the gloom of this often dreary time of the year. For others, I recognise it’s depressing or underlines loneliness, and for some it’s all hype and unnecessary.
It made me think about the ways in which boaters show how much they care for each other, and consider the differences from when we used to live in bricks and mortar. The Skipper, it has to be said, despite or perhaps because of that Yorkshire heart beating inside him, is a HUGE romantic.
For him Valentine’s Day means producing cards and flowers hidden somehow aboard, as well as producing chocolates of the kind I adore. But there are so many other things he does during the year as we boat and live afloat, that show me just how much he cares, even now after 36 years of marriage and a few more years before that.
There is one boat job I hate, but I can count on one hand how many times I’ve had to empty loo cassettes thanks to my Valentine (and there are several each week to be seen to).
He puts on the kettle and gets the fire hot on wintery mornings whilst I’m still snuggled under the duvet so I can get up to a warm boat and a hot cuppa. Equally he stokes up the fire until it’s as toasty as I like it, and merely removes another layer until he’s in his T-shirt…or less!
He never complains about the lumpy cushions on the sofa (one place I store my wool stash), and puts up with knitting, crochet and weaving projects all over the place, always being fulsome with praise when they’re finally finished and even more fulsome with praise when they’re sold (and off the boat)!
At this time of the year, he moves coal and wood around from source to boat, roof to cratch, so I rarely have to lug it about but can still stay warm.
He helps carry shopping down muddy icy towpaths, and when we cruise, he willingly shares tiller and windlass duties.
He also puts up with me decades of me listening to The Archers.
And crucially this week he’s never said anything about me having to do a Speed Awareness Course – not because of violations on the waterways I’m glad to say!
Many of these tasks that happen so regularly for all boaters are for me regular reminders of how much my Valentine cares and as an assistant in Sainsbury’s said this week as I shopped for something whisky for him instead of flowers or chocolates, it’s the little things that happen every day of the year that matter. We agree, but an excuse to give whisky, flowers, and chocolates is something we appreciate too.
We spent Valentine’s Day together appropriately down Memory Lane – in a boat. Well, Memory Lane Wharf in Leicester, to be precise, in CRT workboat Aylesbury litter picking and clearing buddleia and brambles with other Canal River Trust volunteers.
Then it was out for a late cafe lunch, home to the boat to warm up and get a bit of work done, followed by a walk with Boatdog (the other BIG Valentine love) for a packet of mini Cheddars (her faves) and a pint in the Soar Bridge before home for a meal. If I’m honest most of the Boatdog’s adoration is cupboard love… but who cares?
A good day, a day of giving back, sharing tasks and time.
Many boaters, I think, can be real softies at heart. There are lots of boats called Valentine, Love Bug, First Love, Lady Love, Tru/True Love and probably the most truthful of all when applied to a boat – Labour of Love.
Perhaps the greatest thing of all is being able and supported to live the life you love. It isn’t easy all the time. It isn’t all plain sailing. It is, though, something unlike any other way of life. It isn’t like living in a van or on a yacht, although there are similarities, living on a narrowboat as continuous cruisers is liberating, infuriating, and inspiring. It is also something that is so much easier when there are two of you pulling together, having each others backs and sharing the many good and occasional bad times together.
Living together is just an extension of what it’s like to live on a boat – storms, floods, sunshine, and showers but with treats of chocolates and flowers too at this time of year.
Pickingupducks 